I tuck my hair behind my ear as I slipped inside the ice cream shop, quickly scanning the tables to see if I recognized anyone there. I didn't. Mostly because the store was empty beyond the two employees. I bit my lip, wishing again that the windows hadn't been tinted so I couldn't see inside. I usually prefer to not be the first one there when we met up like this. I always felt awkward sitting there by myself with the staff staring at me. But it wasn't like I could just walk outside again now that I'd entered as I'd only look twice as foolish. Steeling myself to feel the worker's eyes on me, I took the closest seat, glancing out the window. Where were they? I'd come five minutes late on purpose to avoid this. Why did they have to be late too?
-Inspiration from meeting up with people at Baskin Robbins
Monday, August 7, 2017
Sunday, August 6, 2017
Me: We're soooo close to finishing this!
Brain: I know right?! It's so exciting!
Me: It is it is!!
Brain: I'm EXCITED!! *jumps up and down*
Me: Me too! But maybe you should calm down just a tad so we can focu---
Brain: Sooo excited!! WE'RE SO CLOSE TO FINISHING!!
Me: And we'd be even closer if you'd focus....
Brain: I know right?! It's so exciting!
Me: It is it is!!
Brain: I'm EXCITED!! *jumps up and down*
Me: Me too! But maybe you should calm down just a tad so we can focu---
Brain: Sooo excited!! WE'RE SO CLOSE TO FINISHING!!
Me: And we'd be even closer if you'd focus....
Saturday, August 5, 2017
Friday, August 4, 2017
Thursday, August 3, 2017
Where'd Ya Go?
It's one of those days where my brain gets more hyper active in the negative actions department.
Where I see a scenario, and automatically come up with a 'bad scenario' relating to it, which then causes me to think about how I would take care of said scenario, and what I would say and do, and basically get myself worked up over nothing.
Today's little nothing,
Was my coworker disappearing from the register and having the manager overseeing it.
As a little earlier that coworker had come to me for advice, that contradicted what the manager had said to do in the situation. And the manager realized that I'd basically said "Yes." when he'd already said "No."
:S oops.
So I was worried, that when my coworker disappeared, it was because they'd been sent home.
The manager had been mad enough that the coworker had basically gone to someone else to get a 'yes' answer to the situation, that they'd sent them home early.
And I was getting myself worked up about it, even though I was trying not to, but I couldn't find the coworker in the store. And I was slightly annoyed that the manager would take such a drastic action, and that it shouldn't be allowed, and that my coworker should have gotten a warning first.....
Only for me to look up the next moment and see the coworker at the register again.
Apparently the manager had had them in a room I hadn't checked doing our monthly engagement videos that teach us about products in the store and safety and such.
As the manager had me do it right after my coworker was finished.
*exhales*
So yah...worked myself up and tensed myself up over nothing.
I need to stop doing that.
Where I see a scenario, and automatically come up with a 'bad scenario' relating to it, which then causes me to think about how I would take care of said scenario, and what I would say and do, and basically get myself worked up over nothing.
Today's little nothing,
Was my coworker disappearing from the register and having the manager overseeing it.
As a little earlier that coworker had come to me for advice, that contradicted what the manager had said to do in the situation. And the manager realized that I'd basically said "Yes." when he'd already said "No."
:S oops.
So I was worried, that when my coworker disappeared, it was because they'd been sent home.
The manager had been mad enough that the coworker had basically gone to someone else to get a 'yes' answer to the situation, that they'd sent them home early.
And I was getting myself worked up about it, even though I was trying not to, but I couldn't find the coworker in the store. And I was slightly annoyed that the manager would take such a drastic action, and that it shouldn't be allowed, and that my coworker should have gotten a warning first.....
Only for me to look up the next moment and see the coworker at the register again.
Apparently the manager had had them in a room I hadn't checked doing our monthly engagement videos that teach us about products in the store and safety and such.
As the manager had me do it right after my coworker was finished.
*exhales*
So yah...worked myself up and tensed myself up over nothing.
I need to stop doing that.
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
Hiking There
I crouched down in the bushes, trying to breathe as shallowly as possible, trying to stay so still that they wouldn't see me. The hikers coming up to my location.
I couldn't be sure that they'd seen me.
I hoped they hadn't.
I didn't want to be seen.
But why else would they be up this way? Why now of all times would they choose to come to this abandoned ruin?
I hold my breath, silently staring down the intruders to my sanctuary. Willing them to go away.
They don't.
Not immediately.
And for what feels like hours I crouch, tense, wondering if they'll find me.
If they'll find my spot.
If they'll try to take me away from here.
I gritted my teeth at the thought.
I couldn't leave.
Not yet.
Not. Yet.
-Inspiration from hiking up to an old abandoned Lime Kiln
I couldn't be sure that they'd seen me.
I hoped they hadn't.
I didn't want to be seen.
But why else would they be up this way? Why now of all times would they choose to come to this abandoned ruin?
I hold my breath, silently staring down the intruders to my sanctuary. Willing them to go away.
They don't.
Not immediately.
And for what feels like hours I crouch, tense, wondering if they'll find me.
If they'll find my spot.
If they'll try to take me away from here.
I gritted my teeth at the thought.
I couldn't leave.
Not yet.
Not. Yet.
-Inspiration from hiking up to an old abandoned Lime Kiln
Tuesday, August 1, 2017
When To Talk
Secrets are an interesting thing.
Because in of themselves, it means that the information contained within the secret isn't meant to be shared with everyone. Just a few or none at all.
Some secrets are easy to keep.
Others are more difficult.
Especially if you're not sure if they're a secret or not....
Like, learning two sides of a story.
Where you get to see two different people's point of views on a single issue.
And realize that the motivations of one haven't exactly been spelled out to the other.
But since you talk to both people, and now know both sides of the story....
You're left with this 'all knowing knowledge'.....
That you may or maybe should not share with the other person.
And it's this little thing.
That's kinda been niggling in the back of my mind for most of the day.
Because I now have information about a situation, from both parties.
And I'm at a loss at how to proceed now that I've acquired this information.
Should I say nothing? Say it straight out? Say it in a roundabout fashion that allows a better understanding without undermining things??
It's hard to say for sure.
Because people don't react always how you think they should.
They're unpredictable like that.
Kinda like the headaches I get....from this potential secret keeping. *Exhales* Or...I really just should have taken a nap today....Yah... probably should have done that too....
Because in of themselves, it means that the information contained within the secret isn't meant to be shared with everyone. Just a few or none at all.
Some secrets are easy to keep.
Others are more difficult.
Especially if you're not sure if they're a secret or not....
Like, learning two sides of a story.
Where you get to see two different people's point of views on a single issue.
And realize that the motivations of one haven't exactly been spelled out to the other.
But since you talk to both people, and now know both sides of the story....
You're left with this 'all knowing knowledge'.....
That you may or maybe should not share with the other person.
And it's this little thing.
That's kinda been niggling in the back of my mind for most of the day.
Because I now have information about a situation, from both parties.
And I'm at a loss at how to proceed now that I've acquired this information.
Should I say nothing? Say it straight out? Say it in a roundabout fashion that allows a better understanding without undermining things??
It's hard to say for sure.
Because people don't react always how you think they should.
They're unpredictable like that.
Kinda like the headaches I get....from this potential secret keeping. *Exhales* Or...I really just should have taken a nap today....Yah... probably should have done that too....
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