Tearful Agony

I'd been hopeful yesterday. 
That the headache wouldn't stick around.
That today would go well.
but not.

It came yesterday sometime around 4pm.
But no matter, I thought. Just take a couple of advil and a shower and it will be fine.
drink some water it will be fine.
I did just that.
Went and was social.
And apparently in the course of being social, the strain of being social, the stress of being out in a new place in a situation I wasn't quite familiar with....
Made the headache pound all the harder.
Still, I figured, perhaps when I get home and eat something more substantial than ice cream and brownies...it will go away.
So home I came, I grabbed a couple Excedrin Migraine, a heat pack, and drank a ton of water, made some food with some substance to it.
And for a while. 
The headache seemed to fade.
It was faint.
It was going well...until the tension in the home arose.
Those feel bad moments when a roomie was down on themselves,
and I ached to help.
But was unable to provide the comfort that they needed.
Still I tried....depleting my energy.

I tried to go to bed early.
Hoping that the headache would be defeated with some sleep.
But I couldn't relax.
Woken up just a few minutes later with the pounding of footsteps overhead as people prepped things for the morning.
Unable to relax.
Unable to sleep.
I took another shower.
Letting the hot water pound on my tense and aching shoulders/neck/head.
And again it seemed to help.
I went to bed.
My mind wouldn't rest, but I tried. I dozed off. Surrounded by heat packs. 
Hoping it would help. 
Agony still.
Agony reigned. 
I tried more liquids, more pills, more heat.
But when my alarm finally went off at 6am..
The headache was still there.
Leaving me shaky.
My defenses down.
Agony. I was in tears.
Because I couldn't handle it.
The pain wasn't leaving. 

Still, I got up.
I forced myself to get ready for work.
Because if nothing else.
Work could help. It's cleaning. It's moving my arms which works out my shoulders which would help to lessen the pain.

I survived an hour. 
I couldn't handle it.
I couldn't talk to people. (which thankfully the store wasn't open yet.) 
Because I was in agony. I was in tears. My voice wobbled and shook and did that whole crying thing, because I couldn't.
I just couldn't. 

I did the bare minimum I could handle so that I could leave the department confident that my coworker could do the rest. 
And with the manager's permission.
I left.
After an hour.

I came home
I crashed. With my heatpacks.
And thankfully.
Some sleep.
Some rest.
Helped to fade the headache away to a more tolerable means.
it lingered after I woke up.
Still there but faint.
It grew a little stronger as I got up.
Moved about.
But it was tolerable.
Tolerable enough with me feeling calmer, more in control of my emotions, that I decided to go back to work.

Why?
Because they needed me.
I was supposed to work 10 hours today because we're sooo short staffed (with people quitting and school schedules) that there was literally no one in the department able to come in if I didn't. 

My coworker who covered for me would only be there for another hour.
And that left three more hours of no one. No one certified in my department.
So confident with my headache, and an Excedrin Migraine once more.
I went back into work to work four more hours.

The headache came, but it's pain was nothing compared to earlier.
I could function. I could work around it. 

And when i got home around dinner time.
More heat.
More liquids.
More food.

The headache is still here.
faint.
Lingering.
Making me sensitive to every little sound that is made anywhere in the house.
But it's almost in control.
Probably.
Perhaps sleep tonight, now that the major stresses of the week are over and done with....will help vanquish it.
One can hope.